BALANCING WORK AND FAMILY

Well balance of work and family is it achievable?

Living in a family with a workaholic mother is difficult. I sometimes do not understand why she prefer to still manage everything by herself. Employees seems to be redundant to her. Since young I was brought up in a family with both working parents. Most of it are handled by my mother, as I grow older, I realize that I do not know who is my "mother" as a person. Daily she works from morning 8am to 4pm in the shop and after tea time, she will be back to the warehouse for to check of new goods coming in and return home between 8-9pm, as for today she went to the warehouse at 9pm and return 10pm+ with our househelper who is still young. After checking and sometimes arranging the warehouse, she still come home to do some book keeping. My dad only helped in the day time in the shop as he has some health issues.

We hardly sit down on a dining table as a family....I spend most of the time eating lunch/ dinner with my dad only. We do not go out for dinner as a family either. I do feel jealous with my friends who often have dinner as a family...so loving and happy. I miss those time I was living overseas with my guardian, where I joined her big family for dinner. I feel the warmth of a loving family. They put a limit to work and make sure they have family time to enjoy together.

As the year goes by, I have seen her as an evil creature in the house. When she leaves for short trip, I feel peace in my heart to be living with my dad for few days. There are times when she shouted at me, I feel that I want her to be gone from this world. Her words is as sharp as a knife and sometimes without realizing, when we argue my words is also as sharp as a knife slicing her hearts. It just backfire her and she is mad at me for shouting at her...

Yes, she brings the income and manage our family wealth, but she immense herself in this working world that I could not see who she was anymore. I feel so angry to be borne in this family. My two other sisters already married and living overseas. They did not understand what I am going through. One of them never even experienced living with her parents as a grown up. She has been living overseas since 12yo.

I love my Dad so much, but he can be naggy at times, we still talk and have conversation during lunch or dinner. Even though we have disagreement about my boyfriend, we still talk like normal father daughter. I feel worried about his health, his both kidneys are not working 100%. What he eats will affect his health, I have told my mother what should be avoided, but sometimes she still cooks evil food for my dad's kidneys.

Thank GOD I have a boyfriend who is helping me with this ordeal. He is helping me to LOVE my mother once again. Teaching me to accept who my mother is as a person, maybe she there to teach me to become a better person.

Dear GOD I really need you to bless our broken family. To bring back the Happy Girl I used to be...
THANK YOU GOD